Monday, 25 June 2018


Most people make the mistake of blaming everybody but themselves for the issues they have. Things will get really better for some couples if they stop pointing fingers and start working on themselves.

Yes, there are some women who nag a lot, and there are some men who are born cheats or just do not know how to love. But most times, you must have done something wrong for that woman to nag always. Check yourself, study your wife, find out what she hates, those things you do that make her nag. If you do not pay attention and you conclude that my wife just likes to nag, then you will never find a solution to that nagging. If she hates it when you go out and drink till it's very late, why not stop it or reduce the rate at which you do it. If she doesn't like you following every hot girl on social media, liking pics of their breasts and ass, why do not you stop it for peace to reign? You continuously do the things she doesn't like, because you do not pay much attention to know that she doesn't like those things, but then you expect her to stop nagging. Instead of going out to complain to people that your wife nags too much, simply stop doing what makes her nag. But if what you are doing is something you do not see as being wrong, then explain to her why she has nothing to worry or work herself up about.

Also, that cheating husband, have you sat and thought about it, maybe it's because you are starving him of sex, you are no longer romantic like you were when he was dating you, you've let yourself go. Spice up your marriage to reduce the tendencies of cheating. But there are also some men that cheat no matter what, they cheat on women that do their best to be good wives to them, how can you expect a perfect wife when you are not a perfect husband? There's no way a woman that suspects you of cheating will
give you peace at home. Women notice those little signs when you start cheating. Once you cheat on a woman, you turn her from that nice, calm, loving wife to your enemy. Nothing destroys a woman emotionally as much as her husband cheating on her. She becomes insecure, emotionally damaged, starts seeing herself as ugly and not good enough. That type of woman can never be a perfect wife to you or give you peace at home. I know a man that keeps cheating on his wife, she noticed that he cheats and she started making life unbearable for him, he goes around complaining to anybody that is ready to hear, that he married the worse woman on earth. How she's making life a living hell for him. He will complain about her but forget to mention that she became that way because she discovered he was cheating on her. He still cheats with numerous girls, sleeps out at will but still thinks his wife is the main problem for the troubled home.

You want your husband to stop eating out or start eating your meals, have you thought about why he prefers to eat out? Do you cook different nice meals for him? Or it's the same 3 types of meals you keep preparing every week. Meet that your friend that knows how to cook to teach you one or two new delicacies you can prepare for your husband.

Pamper your spouse. You like how some ladies dress and look nice? Shop for your wife, let her know you want her to look good for you. And to the wife, there's nothing wrong with looking good for your husband, God is not against it. It's not a sin to do things to spice up your marriage. Do not wake up all day and not take your bath just because it is weekend and you have nowhere to go. Look and smell nice for your spouse. You and your spouse will need tolerance as a key guide.

Stop talking down on your husband always for the words spoken cannot be retrieved. Men are egocentric, it destroys them emotionally when you make statements like 'you are not man enough' 'my dad is a better man than you will ever be' 'why can't you be like your friend?'. Do not push him away with such words and then complain later that he's not a good husband to you.
You do not buy your wife surprise gifts, it can be just a new under wear and she will appreciate the gesture. You do not take her out on dates, not even once in a while for the fun of it, but you expect her to be happy and good to you. That money you spend on a side chick, try spending it on your wife, take care of her and watch her glow and see how peaceful your home will be.

That marriage or relationship you think is at the verge of breaking, you can easily turn things around with a call or a text saying this 'Sweetheart, I love you, I'm sorry I've not been the best wife or husband I can be to you, I've let things go so far and become so damaged that I became scared of saying sorry because I know no amount of sorry can erase things. But I'm ready to work on this marriage, I'm ready to work on myself, I do not want to lose you, please let's try to make it work together, people learn every day and I'm just learning, with your help, I can be the best spouse to you. When I make mistakes, it's because I'm human, I will never intentionally want to hurt the love of my life. Let's make this work, God brought us together for a reason '. There's nobody that's too harden for such words not to work on them. After all, they once loved you right? The heart that fell in love with you is the same heart beating in their chest. You just have to know the right words to say.

Bottom line is, if you want a peaceful, near perfect marriage (because no marriage is completely perfect), then you have to start by working on yourself first, then ask your spouse to work on themselves too. Don't conclude that your spouse is entirely responsible for your marital issues, you have a hand in it too.

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